• Patrick Buzo

I wrote a song about pedophilia

Hi, this is the script I used for my video on YouTube. You can read it here or watch on YouTube.

A few weeks ago, Maze to Eden published Leave Him Cold.

The song talks about a guy, who as an adult discovers that he’s a pedophile. Because he doesn’t want to risk ever hurting a child, he decides to kill himself. I think that’s a tragic story and I believe we as a society should care about pedophiles and we should have an emotionally disengaged conversation about pedophilia.

Today I’ll answer three basic questions:

What is pedophilia and very importantly what is it not?

Is pedophilia moral?

Why should you care about pedophiles?

What is pedophilia and what is it not?

Pedophilia is a sexual attraction to prepubescent children or children in the early stages of puberty. A diagnosis does not apply to sexual behaviors among pre- or post-pubertal children with peers who are close in age. Pedophilia is a disorder in sexual preference.

Pedophilia is not child abuse. Pedophilia is not downloading child abuse imagery (child pornography), pedophilia is not an action. It is crucial to understand the difference between a fantasy or a desire and an action. Pedophilia describes a fantasy or a desire and not an action.

Research is very hard to conduct in this area because people with pedophilia are a largely invisible group. That’s why a lot of the research is questionable and not representative. A lot of research is being done in prisons and penitentiaries, where they’re studying offending pedophiles. This already shows you how biased such research is going to be, because all pedophiles in those studies are also criminals but that doesn’t at all mean that all pedophiles are criminals.

Is pedophilia moral?

This part is largely borrowed from my soon to be good friend Alex O’Connor aka. CosmicSkeptic. He made a similar case for homosexuality as I’m now doing for pedophilia.

Some people argue that pedophilia and sexual desires towards children are simply immoral. I’d argue that that is an invalid argument as those people are making the assumption that pedophilia falls within the moral sphere. Those people are making the assumption that pedophilia can be judged within the context of morality. I don’t think pedophilia can be judged within the context of morality.

Morality is based on the well-being of sentient beings and tries to maximize that well-being.

Everything we do falls within two categories, the first one being the moral world, the moral sphere or the moral landscape. And the other category is the amoral world, where everything else that cannot be judged within the context of morality lies.

To illustrate this, we can use this table by my good friend Alex O’Connor. It’s split into 4 sections. Conscious, unconscious, affects well-being, doesn’t affect well-being. In order for something to fall within the context of morality it has to be conscious and affect well-being.

I’ll give you some examples. If I’m sleepwalking, get out of bed, walk around a little, and go back to bed. That is unconscious and it doesn’t affect the well-being of anyone. Therefore, it does not fall within the moral sphere.

If I’m sleepwalking and I knock down a glass of water over which the next morning somebody slips and gets injured, my action has still been unconscious but this time I’ve affected the well-being of somebody. But still, I wouldn’t have been held morally accountable.

If I decide right now to lift my hand, I’ve done that consciously, but it didn’t affect anyone’s well-being. Therefore, it doesn’t fall within the context of morality.

Now, if I had intentionally injured a person that action would have been conscious and would have affected someone’s well-being. And bingo, that falls within the moral sphere and I could be held morally accountable.

Let’s check with pedophilia. Does pedophilia affect the well-being of anyone? I’d actually say, yes it does. It affects the person with pedophilic interests. But, we still have one other question to ask in order to decide whether pedophilia falls within the moral sphere. Is Pedophilia a conscious choice? No, it’s not. So, pedophilia doesn’t fall within the moral sphere and therefore can’t be judged in the context of morality.

For those of you who might think that pedophilia is a choice, let’s quickly talk about the origins of sexual preferences. There’s no scientific consensus on where sexual orientations come from. Especially concerning pedophilia research has been really slow. But most likely the cause for pedophilia is a mix between biological predispositions and early environmental factors just like with other paraphilias and sexual orientations. But! Even if the main cause was environmental and not biological predispositions, the affected person still never chose to have those sexual desires. Therefore, pedophilia doesn’t fall within the moral sphere. You don’t choose your sexual orientation, you discover it.

Why should you care about pedophiles?

Pedophiles are people like you and me, they could be your brother, your son or your husband. Good people that have been affected by this condition through no fault of their own. Affected people can never live their sexual desires because they know that child abuse is wrong, and they would never do anything to hurt a child.

Pedophilia is one of the most stigmatized disorders today and because of that stigmatization affected people most often don’t have anyone they can turn to and talk to. Currently research suggests that around 1% of men are affected by this condition. That’s a lot of people and they’re largely invisible to society.

Caring for pedophiles and offering them the necessary help to ensure they’ll never become offenders is crucial in child abuse prevention.

The stigma around pedophilia is massive. Scientists have a hard time finding grants to study this condition, because people and institutions are afraid to get associated with this topic. Me for example, I’m studying to be a drum teacher and I can tell you, that I’m probably putting myself in a disadvantaged position, because future employees and the parents of children I’ll be teaching, just won’t want to work with someone associated with this topic. But, if me talking about pedophilia, educating you, my audience, about this subject helps just one pedophile or prevents just one offense, then I think it’s all worth it. In the tune ‘Leave Him Cold’ we tell the story of a guy who discovers that he’s a pedophile and then kills himself because he doesn’t want to hurt any children. That’s not a made-up story. That happens. If I can prevent that I’ve done my job right. If I can prevent child abuse, then I’ve done my job. Lifting the stigma is likely to be the best prevention we have.

I’m a musician and this is not at all my area of expertise, so I’m by no means a voice of authority on this subject. Still, I hope you could take away some valuable information from this video. A few weeks ago, I was lucky enough to get Monika Egli-Alge to have a conversation with me about pedophilia, pedophiles and the work that she does. Monika Egli-Alge is an expert in the field and I’ll be sharing the conversation we had on this channel next week. I left some interesting links in the description for you if you want to dive deeper into this subject. I hope you subscribe and ring the notification bell so that you won’t miss future videos.

When the music ends, the conversation starts.

Kein Täter Werden


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Patrick Buzo